How To Mirror Elegantly To Make More Sales


How are you getting on with this month’s target? As selling is a vital skill to learn to grow your business, and happily stay in business, today, I’m going to give you a new Super Power to help you make more sales.

You’ve heard of mirroring body language, how it helps build rapport?

The person sitting in front of you crosses their legs, so you cross yours.  You  then notice they have shifted their body to sit more prominently on their right side, so you shift yours, sitting more on your left, to ‘mirror’ their body language.

Now, done well, it’s a good technique to help you build rapport with ‘non verbal’ cues.  Being a Sales Trainer, it was obvious to me if an experienced sales person was using the technique on me, it was a great game, as I scratched the left side of my head, and they did the same. I crossed my left leg, he crossed his right. But done too quickly, it’s obvious. If you are going to do it, slow down, as you mirror their movements. Not every movement, as it’s so obvious!

It works when you’re in meetings, but it doesn’t work over the phone as you can’t see them.  So, what do you do in this situation? How can you build rapport when you can’t see them?  I’ve got your back!

Here’s how you can build rapport elegantly, when talking on the phone.

Notice what language they are using when they describe different experiences.

Are they using more visual/auditory/kinaesthetic terms when they give you an objection? For example, they might say, “Ah, I can’t really see how that will help us right now.”  Or they may say, they need to hear it again and talk it through before a decision can be made.  Or they feel uncomfortable with the price and need to know more.

Listen to determine your client’s preferred system of language. They’ll usually use their preferred system often in the conversation.

See = Visual

Hear = Auditory 

Feel = Kinaesthetic

Discovering what words they use to express themselves, gives vital information. It’s not a personality test and doesn’t reveal anything more than knowing what their preferred system of language they use when remembering, recalling and recounting experiences. But it sure can be your unfair advantage in sales.

As you listen to them speak, and I mean, really listen, to the words they are using, how they describe what they like (kinasethetic) about their current supplier, or what they are looking (visual)  for in their next training partner, or the way your proposal sounds (auditory).

Listen carefully, ( I do love that word –  fully – with care )  and notice the words they use, so you can elegantly use the same preferred system – visual, auditory or kinaesthetic,  and mirror their language.

Because it works.  It works when you are in meetings and presentations too.

Have a go today.

Your Action Point is to purposefully and carefully listen to your client’s words, and every so often, especially as you pre-close for the next step, speak the same language.

Weave in those Visual, Auditory or Kinaesthetic words your customer speaks, and deepen rapport. I call this element in my Advanced Sales Training course, “Talk a Deeper Talk” and when done elegantly it is a marvellous way to let your customers know you understand them, which leads to more sales.

As ever, I am here to help you get clarity, feel confident and make more sales, to build your brilliant business.

If you want to talk (A) about this more, and see (V) how it can help you close for more business, but feel you need (K) more help, then please do get in touch with me. (See what I did there?!) How did you feel when you read that? Which part of that sentence connected with you more?  That’s probably your preferred system.

Excellent, I’m glad you noticed that. The secret to deepening rapport using language is to talk in your customer’s preferred language, not yours.

Top Tip – Practise listening.  It’s great to start listening to your family too and respond mirroring their language, and notice the difference it makes. A great playground for you to practise!

When one of my clients learned this, it had a great effect on her relationships with her teenage daughters, as well as her client relationships and results.

So, talking of your September goals, we have one week to go. Put this in practice today and see your results improve.  I’d love to hear how this helps you too and welcome your feedback or any questions.

I’m here to help and support you to make it happen. Let’s go!

To your success and happiness.

Jo James
Propelling your business to the next level.